Because I sure can't!
Hello.
You don't know me, but I know you! Actually that's not true, you know me, because Our mutual Friend here (oh look at him, he's so cute, thrashing around like that) has been talking about me quiiiiiite a lot on this blog.
He even gave me a Name, a new Name, a name that isn't really what I'm called at all but that I like quite a lot, just the same. (His name is Brad, by the way. Funny he didn't tell you that but elected to give me a name over himself) The Monster. It's kinda catchy, innit? More eloquent than my real name, because my parents were uncreative motherfuckers like that. So I'll just yank this title he gave me, here on this ADOOOORABLE little blog, and- oh!
Oh, he's trying to knife his way through the ropes, guuuuys! Guys, follow me, I'm going to
that's better.
I cut off a few of his fingers with the knife~! ^_^
You know, he knew this was going to happen. From day one, he knew how much I hate people who snitch. I think I'll shoot him in both kneecaps now
BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT FUCKIN HAPPENS TO SNITCHING LITTLE BITCHES LIKE YOU
From the moment Brad entered my organization, my Crime Ring, whatever you want to call it...he knew what happens to those who choose to betray me. It's aaaaallllll over this blog, his FEAR of me. I just love being feared, you know, so very very very much. I'm happiest when people fear me. When people fear me, they stay out of my way, they do what I want! and that just gets me feeling all giddy inside! Brad feared me, you can see it in this blog, and yet he chose to deliberately leak information about me to the internet! The scandal, guys, I tell ya! The scandal!
So you see, I had to take him out. And I have to cut out his tongue right now because a.) he won't be needing it anymore, and b.) it looks soooooo delicious when he SCREAMS.
there. Got that taken care of.
I think I like this blog thing! It looks like there's a whole wide world of people out there who use this to talk about what they're doing, who they are, WHERE they are, and all of it seems so...interesting! As long as I don't give out my own information like that rotten snitch Brad then there's no reason I can't follow all of the lovely people who use blogs to talk about...whatever the hell it is you idiots use this shit for. There are even stories about the boogeyman, and other scary creatures, which is the COOLEST SHIT I've ever heard of!
I'll be seeing you around, guys, I promise!! I have to go now, though. I have Brad to take care of, to feed to my boys, and then I'll sleep and wait for tomorrow. I've got a buuuuuusy schedule tomorrow, and I want to be well rested for that.
I'm only human, afterall.
Jess?
ReplyDeleteOoooooh, do I have a GUEST on my blog, already? And one who KNOWS ME?! how exciting! Who are you and how the fuck do you know my name, motherfucker?
DeleteNow really Darling, is that how you speak to an old friend?
DeleteONLY WHEN THAT OLD FRIEND IS NAMED MOTHERFUCKING ANONYMOUS.
DeleteYou really need a name to know me? I'm offended. Truly.
Deleteooooooooooh, are you THAT one.....??
DeleteThere we go.
DeleteThough I can't say I blame you, it's been a while.
It looks like you've done pretty well though.
It's been toooooo long, monsieur...much too long. I've made myself a new coat since you saw me, you should see how pretty it is...
DeleteJust being genetically homosapiens doesn't make you human little Monster.
ReplyDeleteOh hey, Proxie, you're still alive? : D
DeleteI know!
DeleteAnother psychopathic loon? There are hundreds of you buggers!
ReplyDeleteThat said, i an interested in how you broke the guy mentioned earlier. You know, with the snakes and pictures of his family?
I know you! You're the bitch who doesn't allow me to comment on his blog! Fuck!
DeleteAs for the stupid fuck Brad was talking about, Al? Smoke and mirrors does the fuckin trick when someone is stupid enough~! ^_^
The commenting thing should be fixed. Sorry 'bout that. Bitch.
DeleteAs for the smoke and mirrors thing, it's the nature of the smoke and mirrors I'm interested in. specifically, the snakes. Seems like it'd right screw with runners with a wee bit of modification. Or did you get, yanno, actual snakes in there?
Why should I tell you anything?
DeleteSpread the fear? To be honest, I don't expect you to tell me jack, but figured I may as well ask.
DeleteThe snakes were real.
DeleteThe images on the walls were projected by, fucking no shit, a projector.
After that I had my way with him for the rest of the night. First I sliced up his legs and his tummy, in places where no one would see and where I could cut itty bitty little patches of skin off to feed to him. I made him watch while I cut out his appendix and I ate that, because GOD it looked so delicious outside of his body and....
hm. You know I don't remember the exact moment he snapped, I think he was just an idiot and couldn't handle stress.
Moron.
So it was just regular torture? Thanks for the tip, even if I doubt it'll be worth using. Not really that much opportunity, especially since that'd be somewhat time intensive.
DeleteOhhhhh, I don't know about calling it "regular torture"...nothing about what I do is "regular".......
DeleteActually, I think we do have another torture cannibal here somewhere. Hell, I used to do the same thing until I grew out of it.
DeleteSo yeah, pretty much par for the course to be honest.
@pHIL - It was a phase. Teenage angst and all.
DeleteJust because something is repeated does not mean it is "regular" or even "common" you scum
DeleteBut it does mean it aint particularly special. And to be honest, you seem a little out of your depth. You just getting in with the fears? Because burning bridges is a somewhat shitty way to start.
DeleteHarlot.
Hiya Monster, um, so what do you look like so I know to run like hell when I see you?
ReplyDeleteOhhhhh, good question, kit-kat! That reminds me of something I just found.
Delete